Sunday, February 26, 2006

Evil, Taunting Clowns

So yesterday Dana coerced me into going on a jog. A JOG. A jog, people. For those of you who don't know me personally, this isn't something I would normally do. My typical exercise consists pacing back and forth--wherever I am--for most of the day, worrying about something or other. Oh, and lifting some sort of bottle--let's not for get that.










The above picture was taken just as Dana and I were starting out. It was mighty cold, but we were bundled up, as you can see. Then, gradually (after about 3 minutes), I began to realize just how long it had been since I'd been jogging before. My heart starting beating more quickly, sweat began pouring down my face, my throat started burning, and I began to see grotesque, evil clowns taunting me. Dana, however, remained unphased. He was prancing all about, just happy to be out of his apartment--he reminded me of a puppy that had been kept indoors for too long.

We ran for hours and hours. I saw the sun slowly sink beyond the horizon (we had started jogging at about 11:00am). I think at this point we were somewhere in Wisconsin--we kept seeing cows and cheese by the road. At around 6:30pm, I turned to Dana and said I was ready to turn back. He just laughed and kept prancing, shaking his head.

I don't know what time it was, but we eventually reached the ocean. Then we saw some people with weird hats, then some gondolas. At some point we passed another ocean, and somehow I woke up in my own bed this morning. I hate jogging.

5 comments:

KSHIPPYCHIC said...

THAT WAS A GREEEAAAAAAAAAT ARTICLE THERE - AN THE PICTURES, THE PICTURES WERE - JUST SO...LMAO!!!
I LOVE IT!

Lisa said...

So you ran a marathon in your sleep, eh? I hate it when that happens.

Cat said...

Nice - and I got here via your lovely BE Text ad - that Seinfeld reference was great :)

Dirk the Feeble said...

I don't understand the point of this story - were you being chased by some type of wild animal? I can't think of any other reason to be running . . .

Southie said...

Hippy Chic: Yeah, thank god that cameraman was following us around the whole time.

Lisa: Yeah, it sucks.

Cat: Thanks! Seinfeld is and always will be most of my life, if only subconsciously.

Armaedes: I know what you mean. And...yes. I forgot to mention the 300-pound jaguar that was chasing us. We feared for our lives the whole while.